Scripture readings for this reflection can be found at Memorial of Saint Martin of Tours, Bishop | USCCB
In our gospel for today Jesus is pointing out the obvious regarding human nature: "Things that cause sin will inevitably occur..." (Luke 17:1) There's always temptation that may lead us to sin. We need to realize that when we do sin, we should be ready to turn back to the Lord and seek forgiveness from Him and from those we may have hurt by our sinfulness. The Lord is always there to grant us love and forgiveness.
The challenging part of this gospel is where the Lord asks us to be always ready to forgive those that sin or hurt us. "And if he wrongs you seven times in one day and returns to you seven times saying, 'I am sorry,' you should forgive him." (Luke 17:4) I don't know about you, but I find that difficult to do. But this is what the Lord is calling us to do. Does that mean we keep going back to that person who hurts us in order to get hurt again? I don't think the Lord is asking us to do that. But He is asking us to be ready to be always forgiving. I think that it's okay to maintain our distance from those who do hurt or sin against us.
For our own spiritual and mental well-being, I think the Lord will understand us keeping our distance from them. In the act of contrition, which we say when we go to the priest for confession, we include the phrase, "And to avoid the near occasion of sin." If being with someone that constantly hurts us leads us towards the sin of resentment and a lack of forgiveness for that person, I'm sure the Lord will understand keeping distance from them. Praying for them and forgiving them is what the Lord is calling us to do but keep your distance from them.
In conclusion, pray for those we have difficulty in forgiving and pray for ourselves to do what the Lord is calling us to do: to love God with our whole heart, and to love and forgive others and Jesus is asking us to do.
From Arlene B. Muller
ReplyDeleteSome insights I have gleaned from listening to programs on Christian radio & my own experience:
One definition of FORGIVENESS that I have heard: "FORGIVENESS is giving up my right to hurt you for hurting me." So my understanding
of this is that forgiveness means I will not retaliate & I will not hold the person's sin against him. I will neither do him/her/them evil nor wish evil on him/her/them, & I will wish & pray for what is best for him/her/them. The first part is the easiest. The latter two seems harder & we need to pray for GOD'S help & grace & it may take time.
Forgiveness is giving up a desire for vengeance but does not preclude GOD'S justice & if the person has committed a crime it does not preclude wanting the person to suffer the legal consequences for his/her crime. I would say that we should add a prayer that any just punishment would help toward his/her repentance getting right with GOD & experiencing GOD'S healing & forgiveness, reform of his/her life, receiving necessary help, & ultimate salvation.
Forgiveness does not guarantee reconciliation. Although we need to communicate to the person or persons that we have forgiven him/her/them there may be reasons why it is better for us or for him/her/them that we are no longer actively involved in each others' lives. For a long time I longed for a restoration of friendship with two friends who knew I forgave them & still loved them but who still chose to be separated from me. I believed that I was responsible for restoring this friendship & that GOD wanted restoration & I kept praying for restoration for a number of years. I would feel guilty when I heard homilies on forgiveness, even though I had done & was trying to do my part. Someone finally assured me that the fact that this friendship was not being restored was not my fault. The situation was complicated & I finally concluded that they needed to work out their lives without me & I needed to work out my life without them. In my heart I love & forgive them & from time to time I pray for them & I hope & pray they are happy & that they are doing everything GOD wants them to do & becoming everything GOD wants them to become. Hopefully when they remember me it will be with fond memories, love & respect, even though it was for the best that we have not been involved in each other's lives for almost 20 years. For the first few years we encountered one another from time to time but eventually this has not happened for many years. I still pray for & wish the best for them but have stopped praying for a restoration of friendship in this life but only when we hopefully meet each other in heaven.