On this "Spy Wednesday" we hear of Judas betraying the Lord for 30 pieces of silver. This was something that Judas would go on to regret once he realizes that the scribes and pharisees were planning on killing our Lord.
I often reflect on the grief of Judas after he realized what was to happen to our Lord. He was filled with grief, so much so that he committed suicide. Had he not been so self-centered in his grief and recall the teachings of Jesus that he most certainly must have heard, he would have realized that Jesus would have forgiven him for this sin.
Comparing him with St. Peter, who denied Jesus three times, we hear that Peter, once Jesus rose from the dead, was able to reconcile himself with the Lord. As you recall, the Lord asks him three times, "Do you love me" and Peter says, "Lord, you know I love you." It was in this three-fold admission of his love for Jesus that he received forgiveness.
Had Judas not committed suicide and stayed to see the Lord rise from the dead, he, too, would have received the gift of forgiveness.
How many times do we hold onto the sins of our past, thinking that the Lord will never forgive us of them? We all have something in our "closets" that we are ashamed of and may need the forgiveness of Jesus.
During the next few days as we hear of Jesus being turned over to the authorities and die for our sins on the cross, let us place our sinfulness at the foot of His Cross and ask to be healed. And if you haven't done so yet, at first opportunity, go to confession and place your cares, worries and sins into the loving embrace of the Lord, who is there for you to forgive you your sins.
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